RANT #4

Re-make, Re-mix, Re-master... *Re-rolls eyes*

Dear Videogame producers, developers, creators, distributors, publishers, designers and players *checks off list on fingers to make sure I got them all*. If I NEVER see any of the "buzz words" used to Re-sell the same game to me with Re-newed graphics or Re-solution increase, it will be too soon.

Come on people, I bought *insert Re-done game here* last year and now all of a sudden (just because a new generation of systems came out) you Re-decide to push out the same game, Re-imagined and expect me to Re-buy it? How Re-dumb do I look? (I wanted to use another Re-word but changed it to Re-dumb so as not to offend any of my demographic *dodges the bullet*) I can't believe you think that I'm going to fork out another $40 - $60 for the same game Re-wrapped in shiny new visuals. I won't be fooled by your added Hardcore Mode or your Alternate Ending. The Re-purposed soundtrack and Re-arranged events are not enough to persuade me to Re-purchase. Sorry!

Now I know it is VERY difficult to come up with original material in this day and age. "There's nothing NEW under the sun"... Agreed. That doesn't mean you shouldn't try, it's better than Re-gression. Isn't it? Give it a go and see what happens. You never know, if you throw enough ideas around one of them is sure to Re-bound. I also understand that making a sequel or prequel is not necessarily the option for you. Maybe you don't have the material or the budget but it works and would be better at gaining my Re-mittance than giving me "Game I just got all the trophies/achievements for after a year of Re-trying HD."     

"TAG... why you be hating on Re-Games bruh?! Many games have been ported (ported = converted to a different system for e.g. Final Fantasy Type - 0 HD is ported to PS4 and XB1 from the PS Vita) and we're uber happy about it. Do you know how long I we wanted to play that game?"

-_- That's beside the point. There are many ported games out there that I would love to play too. That isn't my issue here. My issue is making a game, then Re-making the SAME game at "1080p/60 FPS" or with "the never before seen missions/ending" and the most hated "including all the DLC stuff we sold separately before now!" (I'm still not sure if GOTY [Game Of The Year] editions fit into the Re-game category... so I'm not going to comment on them too much, at this present juncture) Yes the new systems have way better video/audio outputs and it would be nice to see a older game in HD but do you have to? Doesn't it kind of ruin the nostalgia and the Re-miniscence of the old game? (I use the terms "older" and "old" loosely here) Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should do it!

Of course, ALL of this, Re-wrapping and Re-selling, stems from the "how can we get more money out of them" school of thought that many, if not all, persons in the game industry have adopted. On that note, I'm going to just leave this (photo) here! 

 

RI-DICULOUS!!!

(P.S I want to leave with a clear conscience so I must make it known that Fanboy me is DEFINITELY going to buy Final Fantasy VII Re-make and Final Fantasy Type -0 HD and there's NOTHING Cynic me can do about it. Until that time, 15 Year Old me and Fanboy me are working on convincing Cynic me because we really really want to play Final Fantasy VII since we didn't get to all those years ago.)  

Feeding The Troll...

Now I know you're not supposed to feed the troll but this time... I think it's OK!!!

I was spending my days the way I usually do, at work waiting for it to be over so I can go home, and I got a message from one of my informants (my network is large and in-tune so not much gets past me). Agent Informant (his super-secret informant handle) let me know that the resident troll, at Select Start Gaming (SSG), had just finished playing a few matches of Ultra Street Fighter 4 (USF4). I found this bit of info to be a very mundane and not interesting in the least. (I began to worry about Agent Informant, as this was not something I had come to expect from him. I figured maybe he had burnt himself out and it was time to employ a new agent or, better yet, promote one of my nameless agents to the, what appeared to be, "pending available position." I had started the laboured process of going through the list of suitable substitutes for Agent Informant... but I digress) He began to elaborate on the circumstances and chain of events that led up to his report (him messaging me) and it was then that I understood how such a "trivial" nugget of intelligence made its way into the network.

Resident Troll, is one of the top players in my local USF4 circle. He regularly dominates our (his and my) sparring sessions and on occasion has been known to throw a win or two my way, just to keep me "confident" enough to play a couple more matches with him. So he can practice his brand new combo or character. (Don't think that I am unaware of this trait of yours. I know when and why you do what you do and I just "play" along to placate you. I'm on to you buddy. O_o *does the "I'm watching you" gesture*)

Be that as it may, He has taught me a lot and playing against him has improved my game somewhat. He even helped me convert my secondary character into my has more wins than my primary character (and for this I am thankful).

Agent Informant's expounded message said that Resident Troll had just beaten PIE| Smug. (Yep, you read that right. PIE| Smug AKA Smugkage AKA Smuggles AKA SmugDaBeast AKA King Smug)
For those of you who don't know PIE| Smug is a PROFESSIONAL Street Fighter Player (and by PROFESSIONAL I mean he plays in tournaments regularly, he does well in tournaments regularly and he holds the top position(s) as a Dudley player. He has many different accounts/handles he plays on and he currently holds at least 3 of the top 5 positions for Dudley WORLDWIDE on both PSN and Xbox Live). You can see some of Smug's latest matches in the following video taken from The BEAST's Youtube page. (N.B. you can use as many different handle as you want Smug... we still know it’s you.)  

(The feeding of the Resident Troll commences here. Feel free to skip this section, if you want to avoid feeding the troll, but I have to give him his dues. I'm just that kind of guy)

I must say "Well done, sir!" *gives hearty handshake to Resident Troll*

I have watched you play for hours on end in an effort to improve our gameplay (I have wished for your timing to be terrible and your inputs incorrect, many many times). You went through some rough patches and days where you lost uncontrollably (I secretly laughed at your swearing and saltiness) but you stuck with it and I think it is safe to say your time in the spotlight is greatly deserved. You have my commendation on your exemplary feat of defeating Smug and, in doing so, you embody the  age old adage of "try and try until you succeed." Congratulations! I am proud of you (and hopefully famous by association *suggestive wink*). Who would have thought that someone so close to home, in our little island, would be able to boast about beating a PRO player? You bring a sense of justification to the efforts of our whole clique and I share in your glory. In commemoration of the match and as indisputable evidence to the fact, I have placed below, for your (and everyone else’s) viewing pleasure, the video of your battle with and victory over Smug. (Check out ALL of SSG videos on their Youtube page)

There is also vindication of your struggle as seen in this message sent by Smug after the bout. No sweeter words could have been had. Enjoy them.



"your rose is pretty solid" is Gamer-Speak for "I acknowledge your prowess as a player" 

(Here ends the feeding of the Resident Troll. All parties not partaking in the feeding can resume reading. The coast is clear.) 

"TAG why are you making this a THING? People beat Smug everyday bruh... It happens."

True but this person (someone I know, someone I play with, someone I sit and discuss plinking and frame traps with) beat Smug (PRO player, internationally famous, world renowned) and was acknowledged for it. That to me, is a THING and I am a firm believer in "If I can't be the greatest then I should be a part of the greatest." His win is my win (except when he wins against me), his victory makes me want victories and it gives me hope. If he can do it, I can do it. And even though I may only be an accessory after the fact who was given second hand info and demanded proof (it's the scientist in me). I still feel famous by association and I gonna ride this train to the last stop or until they kick me off.

*puts on conductor's hat, sticks head out the train window and blows the train whistle... choooo choooo*